Matante Sylvie Explains... Spoon Theory

(And Why You’re Not Lazy, You’re Just Out of Cutlery)

You ever wake up, look at your to-do list, and just… want to cry?
Not because it’s impossible — just because it feels utterly un-doable?

Welcome to the Spoonless Zone.

Today, we’re talking about Spoon Theory — a metaphor that changed the way I understood my energy, my limits, and why some days I can handle a whole tornado, and other days I can’t open a can of soup.

What is Spoon Theory?

Spoon Theory was created by Christine Miserandino, a writer and chronic illness advocate, to explain what it’s like to live with limited energy due to lupus. Sitting in a diner with a friend, she grabbed a bunch of spoons off the table to illustrate what chronic illness felt like. And a beautifully chaotic metaphor was born.

The TL;DR:

  • Everyone starts their day with a limited number of “spoons” (a stand-in for energy, mental resources, and capacity).

  • Every task — even small ones — costs spoons.

  • If you run out of spoons, you’re done for the day.

  • If you live with ADHD, chronic illness, pain, or mental health conditions… you probably start the day with fewer spoons.

  • And everything costs more.

🔗 Read the original post here

What Does This Have to Do with ADHD?

ADHD is often talked about as a problem with focus or attention.
But it’s also deeply connected to how we use, manage, and protect our energy.

Think about it:

  • Executive dysfunction = constant energy leaks

  • Task initiation = sometimes burns all your spoons before you even start

  • Masking = social fatigue + spoon debt

  • Emotional dysregulation = total spoon wipeout after one tough conversation

  • Working memory issues = lost time + mental clutter + more effort to do the simplest things

ADHD doesn’t just mess with how you think. It messes with how much it costs you to exist.

Matante Sylvie’s Take:

Listen — my spoon drawer?
It’s a mess. I’m not even sure it is a drawer anymore.

Some days I wake up with three chipped teaspoons and a baby spoon from 1989.
Other days, I’ve got a ladle, a shrimp fork, and something I think might be a melon baller.

That’s ADHD life.

It’s not consistent. It’s not fair. And it sure as hell doesn’t work like everyone else’s does.
But that doesn’t mean you’re broken. It means your system needs different settings.

Also: just thinking about doing something can cost spoons.
So can decision-making. So can noise. So can trying not to forget what you just remembered 10 seconds ago.

So… What Do You Do With This Info?

  • Start noticing your spoon budget each day.

  • Plan for spoon variability. It’s not a failure — it’s your reality.

  • Rest before you’re spoonless. (Yes, I know that feels illegal.)

  • Say no to stuff that isn’t worth the spoons.

  • Accommodate yourself unapologetically.

You’re not weak. You’re working with a unique neurobiological economy.
You just need to stop acting like you’ve got unlimited spoons in a world that charges a lot for forks.

☕ Final Thoughts From Matante Sylvie

You don’t need more hustle.
You need more self-awareness, self-accommodation, and maybe a drawer organizer for your spoons.

And if you’re out of spoons today?
That’s okay. I’ll hold one for you.

 

xo, Matante Sylvie

Spoon Theory + ADHD: Further Reading

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *